Dennis Lee on my mind...

Polly had a mustache and Suzy had a beard. Polly looked peculiar and Suzy looked weird. But the two had never met. They didn't even live in the same city. So when they had each respectively opened their Facebook to see headlines declaring that Polly had depilated her face with garden shears and Suzy had blown herself up with a bomb they were of course outraged. Neither had ever considered hair-removal and both had a deep-rooted pride in their hirsute profiles. With a few clicks they became friends and a few more clicks and a little boilerplate they had started a GoFundMe: "Décolletée-nay! Whiskers, yay!" declaring "If you find our hair objectionable, how embarrassing for YOU!" and they took to Instagram to post myriad selfies with the best light on their bristles.